what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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