Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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