Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You need Xanax blowdarts
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
