I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
