it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
