Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
