So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
