6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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