scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize