morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
