Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
