She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
