Do vagina's smell?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
