A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
We are two peas in an std pod
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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