But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
