Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
