so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
My breasts were aching with rage.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
