ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Farmville is her only friend.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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