you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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