so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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