I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
