it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
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