Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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