Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Ketchup is God's man juice
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
