my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
