he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
