lets start a swedish sibling band together
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Randomize
