I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
