i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
