K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
