You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
No subtext here. People are naked.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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