this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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