If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
