I need help removing her.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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