i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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