its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
