i'm lost and i look like a hooker
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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