Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
