Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
