yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
