It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
