hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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