pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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