i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
