what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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