dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 609 share tweet
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
soo... how was my night?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
