My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i just google imaged poop.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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