Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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