I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
