My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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